We all hate being blamed for something, but how many of us are quick to blame someone else when something goes wrong? Lots of us do it; I’m not sure of the exact percentage but I am certain that it’s a pretty high number.  Assigning blame is a common thing and everyone has done it at times I’m sure. After all blame is a knee jerk reaction that many people turn to when things don’t quite go according to plan – even if we don’t realise it.

You know what it’s like, you’re in the garden and step in dog mess – it’s much easier – and almost automatic to blame the dog for messing, instead of blaming yourself for not picking it up. Blaming someone else when things go wrong helps us to avoid negative feelings such as frustration, fear, anger and so on, but it is not productive. Automatically blaming others takes our personal responsibility away from us – it gives us an ‘easy out’ of any goals, tasks or chores.

Funnily enough, blaming something else as the cause of our failure rather than holding ourselves accountable, means that we do not need to be responsible. Not being accountable for our own actions or decisions can increase the very feelings of negativity that we are trying to suppress and cause a downward spiral of self-doubt, self-criticism and even self-pity. We need to be accountable for our own decisions, good or bad, to feel pride in our achievements. The very best way to do this is to rely on yourself to solve your own issues, accept responsibility – to be accountable.

If something doesn’t go to plan, take a step back, look at it logically and examine the facts to help you gain insights to do better next time. What could you change? Are your expectations realistic? If you intend to ask others for help, try to understand what is in their control. Maybe just a simple change of strategy could help you to create new healthy habits which would support you in reaching your goals such as cleaning up the dog mess daily, setting an earlier alarm, saving a small, regular amount or being more specific when stating your needs or clear in your aims.

Accountability is a critical factor in achieving success within our careers, relationships and life!