I wholeheartedly believe that we cannot receive love until we love ourselves. The relationship we have with ourselves is probably the most important and hardest one to maintain.

“Often the relationship that needs the most work is the one we have with ourselves”

– Robert Tew

Recognising the love you are surrounded with is problematic when you are struggling to love yourself. The love we see is usually equal to the love we show ourselves which is why it is so incredibly crucial to love and care for ourselves.

Love can be shown in so many ways, from someone texting to ask how you are or how your day was, to your loved ones asking if you’ve eaten that day, your child giving you a hug or randomly telling you they love you. Love is shown with thought and kindness.

Occasionally, we can think we are showing ourselves love by putting on our best outfit, getting our hair done and putting on a brave face but instead of addressing our internal issues we are just masking them. We need to address the problems we are having in our own mind, are you unhappy with your body image or fitness level? Do we feel guilty for not giving our bodies the right nutrients and late-night snacking? Do we keep adding to our pile of paperwork hoping it will file and organise itself?

It’s so easy to complain but we don’t start to feel the benefit of self-love without actually taking care of ourselves.

Set yourself a bed time and make sure you are getting some proper rest (over-tired is an adult problem too!)

Put the screen away and read in bed instead, it relieves your eyes and it’s good for your brain.

If your fitness levels or overall health is affecting you then start taking the occasional walk, get a tailored fitness plan for what you are actually looking to achieve, rather than a one size fits all internet hype that is too much (or too little) for you and will cause you to give up, tag a friend in to help but don’t rely on them being your driving force for change (that has to come from you). I find whenever I’m feeling sad, angry, low, down right cheesed off, I go to the gym and I take all my frustrations out while I’m running or cycling, I’ll go to the boxing bag for a while and although I may look like a flailing chicken and am unlikely to get called up to Team GB anytime soon, I relieve all those built up emotions in such a positive way that I leave feeling ten times better than when I walked in.

Think about the ‘problematic areas’ of your life right now. Now imagine it’s your child or your best friend in your situation. What would you tell them? How would you help? Write down your advice to your special person and then follow it, we often give great advice but neglect our own wisdom when it comes to our own problems, we already have the answers, we just need to uncover them.

Set yourself small manageable goals that really make you feel as though you are showing the same love to yourself as you would your child/spouse/parent/sibling/friend.

SMALL WINS > BIG LOSSES.

Another powerful form of self-love is therapy. Whether that be a massage for all the tension you’re holding within your body or to go and speak to a counsellor about your feelings, sometimes having an outsider’s point of view will help open your eyes to a different perspective and help you uncover those hidden answers you’ve been searching for.

The world could absolutely use more self-love. Everyone needs a helping hand and it’s perfectly fine to ask for help when it’s needed. Loving yourself is all about making everyday decisions that put you on your most positive path to self-awareness, self-love and being kind to ourselves.

If you need help with anything mentioned in this article today you can contact Aria or Anna on planplease@makemeaplan.com,  on Social Medias or via the website. There are also lots of helpful contacts for other reasons you may need help on our post entitled MAYDAY – I NEED HELP.

(photo from tutobrand.com)